As an adult, we have our own ego. Ego to admit mistakes, to ask for help, to accept other people opinion, to make fool of ourself, to say thank you, to say sorry, to cry out loud and even to listen to someone. However, as parents, we should put aside our ego and try to listen to our child.
Listen to their opinion, their own thoughts, their feelings and listen to what they want. Listening doesnt mean agreeing. You can listen to them but that doesnt mean you have to agree on everything they want. Just give them the chance to express it out loud. Dont ever shut you child in the middle of a conversation. For example,
child: "Mom, i want to go to the zoo because..."
mom: "NO!"
Dont interrupt and shut them off like that. Give them the chance to finish up their sentence. In this way they dont feel so unappreciated and left out. Moreover, give them good reason and put it in a nice sentence.
child: "Mom, i want to go to the zoo because my teacher told me to take a picture of a monkey."
mom: "i'm sorry honey, but you cant. You got fever remember?"
In the first situation, the child will be angry with your answer and they will tend to rebel by crying non stop or yelling at you. They will pull a face infont of you and start to refuse eating or listen to you. This is because you dont listen to them! In consequence, you will be angry and start using physical involvement excessively. That simple situation can cause child abuse, so start listen to your child. It wont kill you.
Every word are belong to me, Hanis.
Listening is one of the parenting skills that every parent should develop. It is just simple act but very effective.
ReplyDeleteListening is the most important aspect for the child to be able to gain trust with her mother. I gained a better understanding of the kind of parent I want to be. positive parenting
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